Ivanism
The supreme religion, in which Ivan is the supreme deity. Statistics show 'Ivanists' (followers of Ivanism) live on average 11 times longer, and are 60 times as happy! Ivanists have a set of 'Tenets' by which every Ivanist must abide: 1. Ivan is the way 2. Have no gods before Ivan 3. Convert as many people as possible to Ivanism 4. Say the most diabolical, discombobulated things to Ivanists 5. You must believe the universe was created in the image of Ivan 6. Every Ivanist is beautiful in the eyes of Ivan. Ivanism originated when Ivan had spoken to a particular Ivanov, and told the latter "You must spread my gospel and Ivangelise the world"
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