heartbroken

when you love someone. when they love you too. or you thought they did at least. they said they would never leave you and that they loved you. you never trusted people easily because of your past but you put your heart in their hands and asked them to be careful with it and they said they would but they crushed it. when your heart breaks, you feel this stabbing pain and you feel sick like you can’t eat and you don’t understand anything and you don’t know what you did wrong and all you want is them but they don’t want you anymore and you can’t eat and you feel sick and you can’t stop crying or even worse, you go numb. your mind shuts down, all your feelings fade away. you’re at a loss of emotions. you gave them your everything and all they gave you was pain. you trusted them. they promised they would never leave, but they did. they left. and they’re gone now. and there’s nothing you can do about it because no matter how hard you try to fix things it never seems to be enough cause some way or another you end up messing something up, and even if you know it wasn’t your fault you can’t blame them because you love them so much so you take the blame yourself and they blame you too. you always had a feeling deep down this would happen but you always pushed it away because you thought they would never do that to you. i guess we know who won the “i love you more” game.