Hazleton

A dilapidated city that should have become the Centralia, PA of Holocaust proportions, but unfortunately failed at sinking into the ground, or at least burning out enough toxins to be harmful enough for the mountain to be evacuated. The most ghetto city in Pennsylvania besides Allentown or Philly, the money that should be spent on fixing the roads instead goes to welfare and food stamps because the city is so poor that nobody's job can even afford to pay them well enough to live comfortably. It is overrun by rednecks, whites who never graduated high school, Hispanics, most of whom cannot speak 2 words of English to save their lives, black people who are making more progress than the rest of the melting pot up here combined, Slovaks and Italians who complain about the influx of other cultures whilst hiding away in their Roman Catholic churches, bums, and a surprising population of sexual deviants (i.e. the usual craigslist frequenters who cheat on every boyfriend or girlfriend they get). Most of the inhabitants of Hazleton pretend their lives are okay while others hide in bars after their shift ends to drink, dance, and smoke away their misery. Others just fuck it away and then go to Dollar Tree in a mad rush to buy 5 pregnancy tests. Hazleton is the ugliest place you'll ever see in your life, and I hope that you are not as cursed as I. Also, never live with your ex-boyfriend. ESPECIALLY NOT IN HAZLETON.