GoatseMobile

A very sexually appealing automobile, first seen on episode #204 of the snimated television show "Arthur". This vehicle has the ability to travel at unspeakably slow speeds, the highest of those speeds only being one millimeter per month (1mm/Mn). For this reason, the GoatseMobile is usually only seen in museums... This vehicle was first manufactured in 1909, and after only making six models, the company went completely bankrupt, because the creation of the driveshaft was inexplicably complicated...The main shaft was made of pure diamond, and contained thirteen different sets of cogs rotating at different speeds and sizes through the center of the shaft, which was what made it drive so slowly... The company was later restarted in 2006 with a much less complicated design. The vehicles now have a maximum top speed of three billion miles per hour, which is the fastest ever for any vehicle or any other moving object... The company has been doing quite well, and is partnered with GoatFactory's Goat Factory in the Goatse department. The two are both owned by Michael Jackson, and that is where he received his incredible health...