Fetlife

Fetlife IS basically Facebook for BDSM/kinky people. Fetlife IS NOT a hook-up website or a dating website. Many guys go on Fetlife and get really, really frustrated when hordes of women don't swarm them like submissive, cock-starved zombies. Thankfully, they're usually to ashamed of their sexuality to show up to real-life events. Most events put on by your local BDSM community will be posted on Fetlife, so it's a great place for newbies to find real-life events. When two kinky people meet, they add each other as friends on Fetlife to keep track of each other. This is because if you ever meet someone at a BDSM function they probably won't be willing to add you on Facebook until you're a close friend. Once you start going to munches and parties, you can meet/find a kinky partner just like you would find a normal, vanilla partner. The only difference is that kinky people are usually pretty nerdy, so being a nerd or quirky will actually wind up increasing your odds. Also, having a mutual interest in BDSM is one hell of an ice breaker.