Evesham

Stinking toilet of the Midlands that Shakespeare once passed through on his way to London or something. Known by it's inhabitants as 'The vale of Evesham' to somehow bestow upon it an air of class. (FAIL). The typical 'Evesham female' has a combination of webbed feet, a slight brummie accent, and poor personal hygiene. Their uglyness is a genetic flaw thought to result from centuries of in-breeding, beastiality and ingestion of Worcester Sauce. Easily tempted into sex for the price of roughly 3 pints of ale. The elusive and seldom seen 'Evesham male' is a rare sight indeed. Often only seen in dole queues, pubs, or fishing on the banks of the river Avon... anywhere but actually working/contributing to society really. He is afflicted with severe retardation, equally poor hygiene and has (on average) the lowest IQ in Western Europe. Of those aged 16–74 in Evesham, 57.5% had no academic qualifications or one General Certificate of Secondary Education (GCSE). This nugget of info came from the 2001 National Cencus (god bless the internets <3) and really brings to light the 'special' nature of this waste of fucking real-estate. When told of his need to pass through Evesham on his way to London Shakespeare is reported to have exclaimed: "Evesham ya cunt? Can ye not go around the bastard?! I fuckin hate Eveshite me!" - And thus the name 'Eveshite' was born. A name the townsfolk have come to love and cherish for the past 400 years.