Dick
Man's most magnificently majestic manifestation of his raw power and potency. In appearance, when hard, it resembles a rocket on the launching pad, and it has the same turbulent thrusting force and energy. Just as a rocket can send a satellite into orbit, it can send a woman into orgasm, which is no less awesome a feat. In sex, it performs at least four distinct functions: first, by achieving a hard-on, it signals to the woman that its owner is both capable of having sex with her and eager to do so, which, if she finds him attractive, tends to kindle her interest. Second, by discreetly (or sometimes not so discreetly) pressing it against her increasingly warm pussy while they make out, he turns her on and gets her hot. Then, when she really does want him, it becomes a way of her signalling her own desire, as she fondles it and kisses it and puts it into her mouth. And finally, when he fucks her, its mad and relentless thrusting drives her wild until she begins to scream with absolutely uncontrollable passion and happiness. If he is lucky enough, he has enough dick control that he doesn't come until after this has happened, which is nice for him as well as her, because the longer the tension builds up, the more enormous the explosion will be when he finally reaches ejaculation. At that point, as the speed of his thrusting becomes as fast as a runner nearing the finish line in a race and as his cock forces all of its gigantic length and girth deep into her pussywith each thrust, he reaches the point where, for a couple of seconds, it seems like the world stops. Then, he feels something like a bomb explode at the base of his dick, and with a sudden and rapid force like water shooting out of a high-pressure hose, he shoots quarts of comeinto her pussy. In keeping with the Danish proverb that "a child of love has many names," this most-beloved part of the male anatomy has a number of colloquial slang nicknames, of which penis is the one most often seen in print, though rarely heard spoken except in doctor's offices or classrooms. A few of the more colorful are given below. In addition to these nicknames, many a guy's dick has a proper name, bestowed on it either by his wife or girlfriend or by himself, and which hopefully has a masculine ring worthy of the dignity of the entity to which it is applied.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Bought this without checking the back for my 12 year old cousin's birthday who adores trains! He's a lil autistic. I thought to 'run a train' meant to work on it and keep it running, much like my cousin is always talking about how he wants to drive a train. I was distraught to hear him turn over the mug on his bday in front of his two very strict puritan parents. My auntie and uncle are threatening to put me on a list now and threatening to sue me for defamation or some shit idk i didnt go to law school cus im not a nerd lols. (unlike them who both went to university) i got a kick ass job as a bouncer for an under 18s club - youd be surprised how big 12 year olds get- but they are just stupid. im worried i might get fired if this leaks.) Thanks a bunch! (sarcasn) - im feeling p down atm, if anyone could cheer me up, my number is 0800 1111, if anyone wants to do whats on the mug LOL (serious). btw, i kept the mug for myself since i found it decently adequate and quite tasteful. /srs
Thanks guys, I knew I was hot but not *that* hot
Great way to wake up and clear your head every morning with the reminder of the day you woke up dumb enough to spend $32.95 for a basic coffee mug
Couldn't wait until the mug got home. Immediately after i bought it i wet myself. I couldn't help it. I got so bored of waiting i ordered 5 more mugs. And then another 5. And then ANOTHER 5. And now i have fucking 60 mugs that say schizophrenia on them. I only intended on gifting this mug to my schizophrenic younger sibling as a last gift before i inevitably must suffocate him with his own pillow. Now with all these mugs and have decided to put one mug on the old couple across the street's doorstep each day until eventually they are convinced that they are schizophrenic and see things that aren't there. Next i will get them to be taken to a mental institute where they will be locked up to live in an all-white facility for the rest of their lives. My hope is that i can do this to all of the neighbors on my street so i can finally get enough space so that i can run my hamster experiments in peace without my neighbors always wonder what the small hamster screams coming from my basement are. Anyways nice mug 8/10.
I dont remember writing "I have dementia" in this cup ? a bit strange... nice cup tho.
I dont even own the mug. I just wanted to write a review about how epic it is>>> fuck you
my kids loved it. delicious and a great snack. would buy again.
it was great 💀
Gave it to my girl, she loved it.
Best mug I have ever had
love shoving it up my ass on a daily!!!!!
WOW THIS MUG MATCHES MY NAME I'M DEFINITELY GETTING THIS FOR MY BIRTHDAY
WOW I LOVE THIS SO MUCH IT EVEN MATCHES MY NAME! I'm definitely getting this mug for my birthday!
I got morb’d
This jar is amazing for vomiting in! i definitely recommend if you have ugly kids!
This cup is cool. I farted on it and my butt tickled
Perfect customized gift- super easy and quick to do and the order arrived in under a week!
Smaller than I expected for the price.
i use my mug for sperm donation
10/10, great for taking a massive shit in. Overflows if its more than 2 pounds, but its part of the fun, right?
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