deadpan

1. (n) A pan that has been brutally murdered, or possibly that has died of natural causes, such as by accidental melting and/or by trampling underneath a crowd of people engaged in a furious riot of extreme pan-demonium 2. (n) The subject of Captain Hook's psychedelic wet dreams contained in scenes from the 1992 film Hook, starring Robin Williams, that were deleted in order to prevent the film from having an X-rating, despite repeated time travel protests from Abraham Lincoln in which he claimed that such removal would needlessly compromise the film's substantial artistic integrity