chav
an ever-growing population of people mostly from council estates. these are mostly 9-15 year olds who think they are gods gift to the world because they are 14 and already has had a child with their morbidley obese girlfriend who probably gave her boyfriends best mate a blow job for a fruit pastille. their main hangout spots are town centres and street corners where they harrass the elderly and the weak and think that this is cool. to attract the opposite sex, which is called a chavette, they wear far to much fake gold and silver which they most probably stole from a market stall at skegness, and wear baseball caps, fake tracksuits (you will find that these are mostly adidas, nike and TN) and and apply ridiculous amounts of cheap aftershave which has the distinctive smell of cat urine. when they have attracted a mate they will give their mate a gift to help their chances of sleeping with them, this is usually an alcoholic beverage (stella artois and cheap cider are highly common) they will then take them to a mating spot, popular spots are on parks and behind bike sheds at school. after this the female or "chavette" will live benifits for the rest of their life and get a council flat which the tax payers will provide, the chavette will then turn the flat into a hoar house and will bring a different chav home almost every night and will neglect the child, unfortunatly this will most probably result in the baby following in their parents footsteps. the chavs and chavettes have developed their own language due to the species being borderline illiterate and needing to form short words to replace others, e.g "blad" meaning friend, or "yard" meaning house, or in the case of the chavettes, council flat.it is likely that up to 90% of the chav population are unable to spell these simple words from their own slang. the chavs have branched off from their far more intelligent cousins; the football hooligans nearly the entire population of chavs are weak and only have a slight amount of bravery when they are with their fellow kinsmen, it is likely that if you get on of them alone they will threaten to shank you with a knife they pretend to have and then run off to their council flat and cry in fear of their lives until they are re-united with more chavs.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
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This mug is wonderful it’s so funny and I gave it to the kid that made the Definition and he started dying laughing
War. War Never Changes. War, war never changes. In the year 1945, my great-great grandfather, serving in the army, wondered when he get to go home to his wife and the son he never see. He got his wish, when the U.S. ended WWII by dropping an atomic cloud on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The world awaited Armageddon, instead, something miraculous happened. We began to use atomic energy as a nearly limitless source of power. People enjoyed luxury once thought in the realm of science fiction. Domestic robots, fusion powered cars, portable computers. Then, in the 21st century, people awoke from the American dream. Years of consumption led to the shortages of every major resource. The entire world unraveled. Peace became a distant memory. It is now the year 2077, and we stand on the brink of total war, and I am afraid, for myself, for my wife, for my infant son, because if my time in the army taught me one thing; is that war, war never changes.
Excellent satire - didn't see comments to that end, so find it hard to fathom if most readers, in turn, didn't laugh out loud, and say so. But apparently not.
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