Canada

Canada has a glorious history, rich in aloofness and high taxes. According to the teachings of Colbert, Canada is Americas hat. It sits up there all high and mighty and yet hats serve no purpose (baseball hats are excluded because celebrities use them to disguise themselves into a regular person). Even the 2010 Olympics is thought by 98% of the world to be located in northern Washington state. Canada was founded in the 1930s when the movies "Reefer Madness" shined light on the magical little drug now commonly known as "Daddies Medication". Because of a monopoly and political power of the cotton farmers, Pot was outlawed, so everyone who was already addicted had to go where nobody would find them to smoke it in peace....Canada. Since its early days, Canada has grown from a population of elves/the french and runaway slaves to that of more elves/the french, less slaves and alot more Japanese. Their government is made up of people who pretend to be a democracy but if the Queen of England visits, they shit their collective pants. They say their free healthcare is "fantastic" and "life saving" but I think if they had bigger houses, fancier cars, and clothes not made from polar bears, they would change their minds. They have never been in a war because they always show up late, without cars, Canadians rely on horses and giant red hats (again with the attention seeking) whenever travelling.