breaching turtle
noun; Known regionally as "mustachious dollarous amphibious," the breaching turtle is a somewhat timid creature that can be commonly found relaxing stage-side at area strip clubs. It is not uncommon to see anywhere between 2-5 breaching turtles occupying the same dimly lit corner. The breaching turtle spends most of its time with its head safely concealed within its t-shirt-like shell (*note: breaching turtles have the ability to remain submerged for up to as many as 3 Def Leppard songs). A breaching turtle will remain concealed until its insatiable appetite for titty resin causes it to burst forth, craning its long neck in the direction of its prey. The breaching turtle utilizes a dollar bill held firmly between its nose and mouth to lure in the stripper it desires. Upon having titties rub in its face, the breaching turtle may linger for several more sets of titties before quietly retreating back into its shell. On rare occasion, breaching turtles may emerge to particularly large, old, or ugly strippers upon which the breaching turtle will hastily recede back into the safety of its 100% cotton shell (see "frightened turtle")
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Quick shipping and awesome hysterical product!
I fucked with it for months before i finally ate it.
Great mug! Got a homo mug for a friend's birthday and he adored it. :)
love it
THINGS ARE GETTING A LITTLE WILD AT CAILLOU'S HOUSE!
The thing is amazing. Also everything on the back is true!
Professor - I am loving this ....not all professors are blasted toward intellectualism. I believe smart comes in all different sizes, color, beauty, and personality. I will use this coffee cup proudly. Loving it in Denver. Jax
It was great! Very hard to break and easy to hold! Also very cute
I sent my friend the Wordle URL for her to enjoy. She did her first Wordle and got so excited, she sent me a text including the answer she got. This showed at the top of my screen and I read it - there was no way to un-read it so I was ... wordlefucked for the day!
Solid mug. Funny design. Fair price
My dad hits me with his mug. It's very very durable
I got the Capybara one made by FAUBCOK and it was so good quality!
i loved the mug, gave it to my grandmother on her birthday
The mug is great! I bought it as a gag gift for a friend, and I didn't really think it was going to be a good mug, but when I got it I was super surprised! It is really high quality feeling ceramic and the print is very clear and good looking. It was also packaged really well, and the shipping process was nice too! It did take longer than I thought to get here, but it's understandable as I did order it custom. In all it is an amazing mug and I think I'm gonna have to buy one for myself.
This mug is great! It comes in perfect condition and I love that you can change the definitions! I put my name and then I put the definition as ‘the best person’. Made my day every time I picked it up.
My name is Asher, I looked my name up a few days ago and we all had a good laugh. Now, this mug is my go to morning mug for drinking my herbal tea and plotting to take over the realms.
I just love it. Just like I ordered!
Exactly as promised.
To beginulate, the muglification of the vessel is both pleasing to the eye as well as the hand. Secondly, the option of choosing one's own colors adds to the lessening if the so called " buyer's remorse" which so often accompanies modern "on line" purchases.
My husband absolutely loves this! This was a difficult product to find but it turned out perfectly! He was cracking up. Definitely worth the buy.
Review Details
Pro Customization
Create unique products with your own words and definitions
Live Preview
Personalize Your Design
Debug: Product Metadata
| Key | Value (click to copy) |
|---|---|
Copied! |
Return Policy
Made Just For You
Each product is custom-printed with your unique text, making it truly one-of-a-kind.
Defect-Free Guarantee
If your product arrives with printing defects, damage, or quality issues, we'll send you a free replacement.
Custom Orders
Due to the personalized nature of your order, we don't accept returns for change of mind or sizing issues.
Questions about your order? Contact our support team for assistance.