bigfoot spank muffin

this is a very complex technique. it involves being nakey. first, you take a fig newton (no other cookie will do) with your foot. you then take the cookie (still cradled in your foot) and dip it in the hiney of the female you would like to do this to. after half of the fig newton is immersed in the booty, let it soak in the oils and herbs of the tushy until the innards become similar to that of a hot air balloon. at this point, take out the fig newton covered in poo and stank and feed it to the female with your foot as you spank the rump. continue this until bill cosby hand feeds you a muffin. amen.