Ashley

Always pretty and fashionable, even from childhood, the Ashleys define femininity, social status and elegance in its uttermost perfection. They always shine wherever they go. Boys will have crushes on them, girls will futilely try to imitate them. But true class can't be imitated. The Ashley's domain is the kind that's featured in interior design magazines. It's often a Big Fancy House that's totally out of reach for a mere mortal. And it always has a personal, unique touch, that speaks wonders of the owner. An Ashley takes care of every detail. There's no such thing as a poor Ashley. Even if all she has is a pile of tires, she will turn them into a lavish palace worthy of her presence. Some people may say they're snobbish, spoiled and mean. That's perfectly normal, those lesser creatures are too full of envy they can't even look at an Ashley straight in the face. They can't handle the honesty of an Ashley. They prefer to live in their little perfect world where everyone is made equal and beautiful. Which is obviously untrue since, well, not everyone can even look or deserve to be like an Ashley. Especially guys named Paul or Joe. Horror. Don't even sit next to them. Only true ladies named Ashley are welcome to this exclusive club. If you aren't willing to raise the bar or to wear purple on Purple Day, stop calling yourself Ashley.