archeops

One of several fossil pokémon. Easily the most outstanding of its fossil brethren, rivaled only by Aerodactyl, this amazing pokémon shares various qualities from both birds and reptiles. A bajillion years ago they used to hunt in packs, but Nintendo and Game Freak came along and limited fights to 2-6 participants for the sole purpose of making sure Archeops don't murder everything. They're also as fast as an automobile, which is like a car, but less aerodynamic. Nature's way of balancing that out was making sure they were terrible fliers, which ultimately doesn't matter because they still get the typing. They're also plagued by their terrible ability, defeatist, which cannot be changed, cementing the species as a species of pussies that can smack your shit sideways.