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Soccer Mom

Fat ass middle-age bitch whose whole life revolves around her children. Drives a mini-van or large SUV due to multiple children. Usually puts stickers on the back car window saying things such as, "Ashley #10 Soccer." Their day consists of: -Wake up & pack lunches for kids (No sweets, pop, or anything unhealthy) -Make sure the kids eat a nutritional breakfast -Review the kids outfits -Drive them to school -Clean -Pick them up from school -Take ___ to soccer, ___ to ballet, and ___ to bible study. -Pick all the kids up and get them all happy meals from McDonald's. -Tells kids to start getting ready for bed, because it is already 7 PM -Has very unpleasant sex with their apathetic husbands once kids are fast asleep Commonly enjoys wearing knit sweaters with high water jeans. Usually have cheesy knick-knacks in their home, such as plates hung on the wall that say things like, "Hope" "Faith" "Believe" etc. Their children are extremely shielded from the real world, not being allowed to watch anything with bad language or sexual references. Can only watch PG-13 movies once they actually turn 13. Must be approved by the soccer mom first. Can't buy music, watch TV, hang out with friends, or anything without approval from their soccer mom first. They install V-Chips and/or parental controls on 3/4 of the TV channels. This leaves educational channels, which they usually end up blocking because of real life content. Ex. The History Channel, The Animal Planet. Usually pushes their hopes and dreams on their kids and forces them to follow them, which ends up failing epically. Their kids are so sheltered and forced to give up their individuality, which results in corruption. Their "perfect little angels" are usually hoes, sluts, bitches, potheads, drug users, drunks, or just all around bad kids behind their back. Heavy denial is involved at this point. Soccer moms are strictly christian, anything that doesn't have to do with it is the "devil's work." Soccer moms are constantly seen glaring at teenagers who curse or are "rowdy" in any sort of way. Tries to tell teens, who are complete strangers, what they can and can't do.

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The Urban Dictionary Hoodie

Soft and cozy blend
Printed on-demand just for you
Drawstring hood
Front pouch pocket
Ribbed cuffs and waistband
Design on front, blank back
Every order personally reviewed
23
5
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0
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Orderd a large hoodie about two years ago and the print in still holding up. I recently order a XL just do to the fact that the original has shrunk a little. The new hoodie is made with thicker material and fits perfect. I recommend ordering one size up.

Marcus D M. Mar 4
✓ Verified Purchase

Shit

Kakkakajs Aug 27

SUPER SIGMA. I LOVE IT.

Kai C. Jul 1

TO THOSE ASKING, YES, THE GORGEOUS MAN COMES WITH THE SWEATSHIRT BUTTTT YOU HAVE TO PAY 100 TIMES MORE THAN ASKING!

smiggen s. Mar 10

Question… does that gorgeous man come with the sweatshirt? I will gladly pay 100 times more than asking!

Maddi M. Feb 27

bro my dog started barking when I wore this hoodie, he started talking in spanish and was like "Aiiiiii te ves sexy ¿Puedo conseguir tu número?" and then he did the stanky leg before he packed his bags and got 3 tickets to bikini bottom. I asked him who the other 2 people were and he told me "nah i just tryna sleep". Had to respect the dog, he got that dog in him. but yeah the hoodie was warm

Dogsta G. Feb 26

made me look like the gyatt rizzler,the girls loved it!!!

kai h. Feb 16

It was softer than expected! Great fit for me, I love the way it wears. It is my favorite sweatshirt

Craig C. Feb 11
✓ Verified Purchase

Very expensive for just a word on a sweatshirt, but my son was thrilled with it.

Christen M. Jan 20
✓ Verified Purchase

I kinda liked it.

Lil M. Jan 3

Would be South better to have the definition on it as well like we used to be able to customize tshirts, sweats or mugs especially at the higher prices…

Mitzi K. Nov 6
✓ Verified Purchase

Size adult medium unisex was a perfect fit. Shirt was very soft. Could be a bit thicker for the price.

Art N. Feb 2
✓ Verified Purchase

wrote shart and wore it to a party

tyler j. Jul 4

i said shart and wore it to a party

i dont e. Jul 4

Hahaha hoodie says cum dump and I wore it in public

Katrina S. Mar 3
Review by Ahmed E.

I LOVE THIS HOODIE!! It’s very comfortable, the writing seems like it’ll last for more than a few washes. Something to consider is embroidery! That’ll make your products stand out from just a regular hoodie with printings. Worth every dollar.

Ahmed E. Nov 16
✓ Verified Purchase

Absolutely brilliant my Argentinian son wi be very pleased

Big S. Oct 20

My boy like the hooded attire.

Ngalasa i. Oct 18

Navy Quality Goods Awesome! My girlfriend Becca loves it!

Alex Sadler Sep 24

Navy Quality Goods I bought this shirt to wear whilst i sail the seven seas with my sea cadet friends, i really like the design because i can walk around and everyone knows im a wannabe pirate. I also like the colour choice, i am able to use it as my stealth suit whilst we do our practice drills with spray painted nerf guns :) would buy again!

Alex Sadler Sep 24

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Size Guide

Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your hoodies at home and compare!

Hoodie measurements

A - Length

Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem

B - Width

Measure across the chest from side to side

C - Sleeve Length

Measure from center back collar, over shoulder, down to cuff

Size Chart

Size Length Width Sleeve
S27"20"33½"
M28"22"34½"
L29"24"35½"
XL30"26"36½"
2XL31"28"37½"
3XL32"30"38½"
Size Length Width Sleeve
S69 cm51 cm85 cm
M71 cm56 cm88 cm
L74 cm61 cm90 cm
XL76 cm66 cm93 cm
2XL79 cm71 cm95 cm
3XL81 cm76 cm98 cm

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