soccer mom
going to go out on a limb here and claim expert status on identifying and defining soccer moms. my qualifications: grew up in california suburbs. in soccer family (mom and dad both coaches). have one child myself. am 37 years old. true, i don't drink coffee. and i live in san francisco, where, in tiny pockets, soccer moms do rear their ugly (over-highlighted) heads, but are promptly ridiculed until they crawl back into their climate-controlled SUVs and circle the city, endlessly looking for parking that can accommodate their concorde-size vehicles. soccer moms are frightened people. threatened people. they sometimes seem smug and heedless, but everything they do is governed by feelings of inadequacy. ever read the malcolm gladwell story in the new yorker that reported that the single biggest psychographics assocated with SUV drivers were (1) being a bad driver; and (2) lack of confidence about the state of your marriage? hello, soccer mom. lacking individual ambition, they channel all their fervor into their kids' lives and accomplishments, resulting, later, in many years of therapy for said offspring, who end up deranged and oppressed by the SM's maniacal child obsession. soccer moms are unhappy people, and often conflicted about the traditional (read: regressive) gender roles they have decided to embrace. they are in too much denial to admit that they, like the rest of us, just didn't want to work outside the home anymore, so they tried to turn childrearing into a career. (not saying it isn't legitimate work, but it would be nice to get an honest explanation of the original motivation.) they are threatened by women with careers, younger women and women who struggle to balance their jobs and their kids' needs and don't want to subjugate their own needs every day of their lives (and thus become bitter, like the SMs). if you resist the trappings of soccer momdom yourself, they are threatened by you. ("how can your family get by with one car? what? it's a 9 year old mazda sedan? does it even have cup holders? or tethers? or tethered cup holders?") not even getting into the right-wing, censorship-promoting, christian reactionary part of it all, SMs are downright dangerous for the culture. they oppose critical thought on principle. man, isn't that bad enough?
The Urban Dictionary Hoodie
Absolutely brilliant my Argentinian son wi be very pleased
My boy like the hooded attire.
Navy Quality Goods Awesome! My girlfriend Becca loves it!
Navy Quality Goods I bought this shirt to wear whilst i sail the seven seas with my sea cadet friends, i really like the design because i can walk around and everyone knows im a wannabe pirate. I also like the colour choice, i am able to use it as my stealth suit whilst we do our practice drills with spray painted nerf guns :) would buy again!
Nice It's pretty good to describe my mood around my parents!! Love this! Make more!
Shit
i said shart and wore it to a party
wrote shart and wore it to a party
SUPER SIGMA. I LOVE IT.
why I can't believe that I found it. A diamond in the dust. a needle in the haystack. A Chankla hoodie. no seriously I just bought a hoodie that only said Chankla. Best purchase btw
Pretty good It isn’t very hot and sweaty but other than that it is pretty good
TO THOSE ASKING, YES, THE GORGEOUS MAN COMES WITH THE SWEATSHIRT BUTTTT YOU HAVE TO PAY 100 TIMES MORE THAN ASKING!
Better then Gucci and LV I bought 3 of these and omg I’m done it’s literally the best hoodie I have ever worn.Its so good that I think the hoodie give me powers like Shaggy.I hope this becomes better than any other brand that’s how good it is.
Orderd a large hoodie about two years ago and the print in still holding up. I recently order a XL just do to the fact that the original has shrunk a little. The new hoodie is made with thicker material and fits perfect. I recommend ordering one size up.
Hahaha hoodie says cum dump and I wore it in public
Question… does that gorgeous man come with the sweatshirt? I will gladly pay 100 times more than asking!
bro my dog started barking when I wore this hoodie, he started talking in spanish and was like "Aiiiiii te ves sexy ¿Puedo conseguir tu número?" and then he did the stanky leg before he packed his bags and got 3 tickets to bikini bottom. I asked him who the other 2 people were and he told me "nah i just tryna sleep". Had to respect the dog, he got that dog in him. but yeah the hoodie was warm
made me look like the gyatt rizzler,the girls loved it!!!
It was softer than expected! Great fit for me, I love the way it wears. It is my favorite sweatshirt
Size adult medium unisex was a perfect fit. Shirt was very soft. Could be a bit thicker for the price.
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your hoodies at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from side to side
C - Sleeve Length
Measure from center back collar, over shoulder, down to cuff
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27" | 20" | 33½" |
| M | 28" | 22" | 34½" |
| L | 29" | 24" | 35½" |
| XL | 30" | 26" | 36½" |
| 2XL | 31" | 28" | 37½" |
| 3XL | 32" | 30" | 38½" |
| Size | Length | Width | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 69 cm | 51 cm | 85 cm |
| M | 71 cm | 56 cm | 88 cm |
| L | 74 cm | 61 cm | 90 cm |
| XL | 76 cm | 66 cm | 93 cm |
| 2XL | 79 cm | 71 cm | 95 cm |
| 3XL | 81 cm | 76 cm | 98 cm |