Canada's History

n. An intricately ritualized, traditional and jaw-droppingly depraved Canuckian sex act which involves the following elements: An hermaphrodite, the Stanley Cup, a bull moose and two pre-op transgender wannabe shemales balancing on a dog sled pulled by three dozen shaved beavers. The transgenders lube up their puckering loveholes with copious amounts of genuine grade-A maple syrup and both proceed to simultaneously mount his/her respective moose antler and fuck the shit out of it. The hermaphrodite then allows him/her self to be skullfucked by both shemales in his/her turn and giving a foot job to the shemale who is not concurrently being blown. After greedily scarfing down their cum, the hermaphrodite vomits it into the Stanley Cup, halts the sled and slaughters a half dozen of the shaved beavers and collects their blood in the Stanley Cup. He/she then uses half the blood/cum mixture to lube up the moose's asshole and fucks it; then uses the other half to lube up his/her own ass so as to take the stud's hefty load inside his/her ass. (During this time, the two shemales drink one pint of maple syrup to boost their languishing energy.) Then, the two aspiring shemales fuck in the ass or "beaver", according to his/her choice, the remaining two and a half dozen shaved beavers and then bite off and ingest whole, their heads one by one after filling them each nearly to bursting with cum so that their little beaver eyes are practically begging for a swift and merciful death.