Vogon
Here's what to do if you want to get a lift from a Vogon: Forget it. They are one of the most unpleasant races in the galaxy. Not actually evil, but bad tempered, bureaucratic, officious and callous. They wouldn't even lift a finger to save their own grandmothers from the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal without orders signed in triplicate, sent in, sent back, queried, lost, found, subjected to public enquiry, lost again, and finally buried in soft peat for three months and recycled as firelighters. The best way to get a drink out of a Vogon is stick your finger down his throat, and the best way to irritate him is to feed his grandmother to the ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal. Vogon poetry is of course, the third worst in the universe. The second worst is that of the Asgoths of Crea. During a recitation by their poetmaster Grunthos the Flatulent of his poem "Ode to a Small Lump of Green Putty I Found in my Armpit One Midsummer Morning" four of his audience died of internal haemorrhaging and the president of the mid-galactic Arts Knobbling Council survived only by gnawing one of his own legs off. Grunthos was reported to have been "disappointed" by the poem's reception, and was about to embark on a reading of his 12-book epic entitled "My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles" when his own major intestine, in a desperate attempt to save humanity, leapt straight up through his neck and throttled his brain. The very worst poetry of all perished along with its creator, Paul Neil Milne Johnstone of Redbridge, in the destruction of the planet Earth. Vogon poetry is mild by comparison.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Quality and style are outstanding relative to price point.
Love it! It is my favorite mug. Easy to hold because of its shape and weight. Now my go-to mug.
My wife is truly beautiful and this cup was perfect for her.
Awesome mugs! My GF laughed her ass off, lol!!!
t-this mug changed my life. At first i was a loner but then i bought this mug and i became HIM. I thank this mug everyday for its blessings
Cute, good quality, *****!
Exactly as expected!
My order was delivered very quickly and was high quality. Glad to add it to my mug shelf.
God is still alive. The existence of this mug shows there is still faith that god is dead and is listening to us. God Bless,
Gay Label Adore this. Ordered for my husband, with the second definition on the back, about the gay filmmaker. Makes a nice discussion starter.
Top notch shipping and exactly what I hoped!!
Best mug i have ever purchased! Subscribe
I love it, but of course the definition Ichose for “Unicorn” is too long and gets cut off after “someone is remarkably attractive.” Is there any way to purchase a second mug that has the rest of the quote on it? They’d make a great set as a present. Please let me know. David Tillinghast dtilling480@gmail.com
"Turtle on my name". A tribute to the 50 odd years of misheard lyrics.
My friend couldn’t stop laughing when I gave it to him!
I got mugged A man mugged me and then said I had da big gaye
I love the costume coffee mug. What can you say that's bad about it. It's your choice after all. It's the best mug and I love it😍😍😍😍❤️❤️❤️❤️
these mugs are amazing. I can't
My Power Bottom Queen loves her eggplant colored mug and I let her celebrate her title whenever she so chooses
I use black hobby paint & small brush to add recipient’s name to back of mug (which I requested be left blank - thank you!). This is a terrific gift for hard-to-buy-for slightly warped friends! BG
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