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Metal is a bunch of jumbled noise which always sounds the same. It started off with good intentions but there are only so many original songs you can write using open-eight or open-one on the guitar(for those of you who don't play guitar this is a reference to the frets on which every metal song ever written is played... basically if you need to read this to understand the reference go to guitar center, pick up a guitar and play open-one-open-one-open-open-open-one and you can officially play metal). well i was just gonna be quick and witty about this but now im gonna go on a rant.... metal bands that are incredibly UNoriginal- any band that uses blast beats. don't misunderstand me... i think metal drummers are some of the most musically talented people alive, but when all you hear is five minutes of metronome-like drumbeats it gets redundant. I was in high school band, and i remember being annoyed straight to death when our shitty trumpet section practiced during class because the metronome was going the whole time.(btw being in band was the greatest thing i have ever done for my musical life and if you weren't in band or didn't have professional training then you probably have timing issues) Back to my point... blast beats=obnoxious. Then there is guitar... I am a guitarist, and i KNOW that Michael Angelo Batio is the greatest guitarist who has ever walked the unworthy face of this planet.(Just dropping a good name so you understand what i consider talent.) I know most of the people who read this are not musicians so i will dumb this down a bit. Mot metal bands play in some form of dropped-d(whether its dropped-c like darkest hour or dropped-b like unearth or dropped-a with 7-string guitars or even when morons, who can't understand the fact that guitar is not meant to be a bass, tune down as far as G). so i will speak in dropped-d language... all metal songs are written in one of two keys on the guitar (in standard dropped-d)the key of D-minor(Open-Eight) or F-Major(Open-One<also known as D-Locrian>.) They may tune down to hell and back but they still use the same frets and write the same songs over and over and over and over and over and over and... I know from experience that if a metal band tries to write in a different key then they are labeled as sellouts or emo-fags. and that is just pure ignorance... pure musical ignorance. point is... while metal guitarists are usually amazingly talented players, they are very closed-minded and seem to think they have to play a certain way to prove their true metaldom. Vocals... scream, yell, done. some metal vocalists sing, and sometimes it's good, but sometimes it sucks. The best metal bass players are actually the oneswho don't do anything that remotely resembles the guitars but actually go the fuck off with some crazy basslines that still fits with what the rest of the band. Now if you have made it this far you either agree with me or hate me... but let me tell you why i think the way I do. I was in a faggot-ass screamo band. but i was a metalhead and very unhappy with what we were playing. i was kicked out because i didn't dress right to be in the band(i.e. no girlpants) so i continued my metal binge... I came up with bands like, Cephalic Carnage, Cannibal Corpse, Pig Destroyer, Morbid Angel, and Death. but eventually I realized that i was only listening to that because i wanted to be more metal than the next guy. then i realized that the amazing talent i was hearing was strangely boring and repetitive. My motto for music, and life is "Write something you can't play, and when you can play it you will be better." I still listen to some metal... Between the Buried and Me, Dillinger Escape Plan, The Human Abstract, Glass Casket, The Black Dahlia Murder, and Unearth. Sorry, but I grew up and now i am a better musician because i expand my knowledge of music.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Ceramic mug (11 oz)
Printed on-demand just for you
Dishwasher safe
Microwave safe
Word on front, definition on back
Comfortable handle
Every order personally reviewed
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Fucking awesome. Bought this while drunk and don't regret it.

Alice L.Jan 2
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Cole M. gifted one for me on my birthday. I will never forget that day. 10/10

Rasmus M.Jan 2

I didn’t get one yet but if I did it would also be for Cole M.’s girlfriend, we would have amazing sex

Cole N.Jan 2

Was a gift and arrived on time. Just as advertised. Lots of fun.

Jonathan J.Jan 2
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The price is a little bit expensive, but the gift arrived as ordered. Thanks!

Austin R.Jan 2
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The price was a little expensive, but the gift arrived as ordered. Thanks!

Austin R.Jan 2
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Great mug got one for my highschool crush

Gabriel Z.Jan 2

I was very pleased with the mug and I was thrilled that I could purchase a customized item that perfectly suited the person I was gifting. The only issue I had was that it didn't have the quote from the tv show the word came from as that was pictured on the mug prior to purchase.

Zeezee E.Jan 2
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Came out just as described! Had the full definition. Very pleased!

Andrew O.Jan 2
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Perfect gift As a joke I gave one to my mate but I costumised it. It said tom drunk 24/7 ugly and got lovely hair. The lovely hair part was a joke coz he don’t have any. It was his favourite gift he got for his birthday and he drinks his beer out of it 😂

TiaJan 2

Great mug…. Got one for Cole M.’s girlfriend.

Hans C.Jan 1

I ordered a customized mug for my gf and everything came out well. There were no autocorrect mistakes and the mug was unscratched. Would shop here again

Benjamin P.Jan 1
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Also got one for Cole M.'s girlfriend, even faster sex.

Big D.Jan 1

Istgd imma force my mum to buy this idek hw i find out but this shit looks fucking fire

yo m.Jan 1
Review by Bradley J.

Perfect coffee cup for a hockey fan. Great conversation starter.

Bradley J.Jan 1
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Perfect gift! My husband loved it. So funny and clever!

karen b.Dec 31
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Great mug… got one for my girlfriend… instant sex

Cole M.Dec 31
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As always, these are well made mugs that stand up to most anything. And they make perfect gifts (in this case for dirty-minded members of a wedding party). I’m extremely pleased.

Etan N.Dec 31
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Is a great mug that I purchased as a gag gift for a coworker. You know the one who also as interesting words/phrases that only urban dictionary can explain. Great as a coffee mug and better as conversation piece!

JULIE K.Dec 30
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👍

Matthew K.Dec 30
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