Mello
Mello, birth name being Mihael Keehl, is a character in the anime and manga, Death Note. He's almost always eating chocolate and wearing black leather. Why he wears leather is beyond me. From personal experience, I find that it leaves me sweaty and uncomfortable while wearing leather. But whatever, I guess. I read somewhere that it's Mello's way of soliciting for gay sex, which I tend to believe. Onto the story… After being told by Roger (a massive douche) that L had been killed by Kira (Light bulb Imagay), Mello promptly threw a hissy fit. He had to force himself to calm down and stop stomping on Near's puzzle to ask who L had chosen as a successor. When he was told that L had decided to be a lazy slacker and not choose ANY of the Wammy children to be his successor, Mello went batshit insane and joined the mafia. In order to gain ranks in the mafia, he had to become the mafia boss's whore and take it up the ass quite often. Mello inherited the Mr. Badass Mafia Boss's position when said Mafia boss's penis disintegrated inexplicably. To save himself embarrassment and shame, he left his mafia-related responsibilities in Mello's incompetent hands and fled to Holland. A few important things about Mello: He is always PMSing and eating mass amounts of chocolate. Yeah, like...always. His father was Willy Wonka, which makes Willy Wonka a deadbeat dad. Mello’s father failed to provide for his son. Why the fuck else would Mello be in an orphanage? I'll tell you why. Just after Mello's third birthday, Willy Wonka was taken into rehab for his chocolate addiction. Just as he was on the road to recovery, he relapsed and died. Unfortunately, Mello inherited his father's life-threatening addiction, which eventually proved to be the blond hellion's demise. Matt (Mail Jeevas, a.k.a., Mello's fuck buddy) would have been devastated because of Mello’s death, had he not been distracted by Fallout 3, or dead himself. Mello will forever live on in the hearts of the few people who actually cared for him. Not a lot of people did, to be honest. Mello was prone to random bouts of rage, which probably stems from his feelings of anger toward his father for allowing himself to be trapped in the clutches of addiction, and passing that addiction onto his son. Even though Mello was disliked by many, Near even outdid him on that. Everyone hates Near. Fuckin' Near. -_- Arrogant asshole.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
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I've had this mug for over a year now and every single day it watches while I shower. It makes me safe sometimes protects me from the voices. Other times I'm lying on the couch watching judge Judy and eating my hot pickles and the mug becomes angry I feel it approaching me with menacing aura. Next thing I know I'm pooing out pieces of ceramic. Overall, its a great mug but only if you can afford multiple colonoscopy's and extremely invasive anal procedures a year. If you have the money for that THIS IS THE MUG FOR YOU.
This mug has given me a new meaning to wake up everyday. I absolutely adore it and I don’t think my life would be the same if this mug did not exist. A gift from God, truly.
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My daughter is a Seinfeld afficianato. She was pleasantly surprised when she opened the package with her Penske File mug. It has the definition of Penske File from the Urban dictionary. Totally worth the price!
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My brother Tom became an uncle & urban dictionary created a wonderful uncle Tom mug…
It is special to have a mug that has to do with my dad who invented a word when we were growing up. He passed away last year. Drinking from this mug is like spending time with him.
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This mug gives my life purpose. It's what I've always said. Patience is a virtue and hard work never betrays. Ever since I was born I've been struck with one misfortune after another, but today it all paid off. I got my own mug, and I use it anywhere and whenever I can! Both of my legs are shattered because to my wife threw me in the middle of traffic and my windpipe is messed up due to me screaming all the way from the crash site to the hospital thanks to the unbearable pain I was feeling. Although even with all that's happened this is still the best day of my life. I suppose the only problem I have is that whenever I happen to look at my cup I get a little too happy. That causes problems because my life support can't handle my exhilaration, haha! I'm just kidding; that was just a little lighthearted joke of mine. I actually cannot afford life support because I spent all of my life savings on this fine piece of pottery. Not to worry though! I can get through the pain with my will and drugs - I mean medication. P.S. There are definitely no ghosts in the mugs. Just wanted to point that out in case someone was worried about that.
I bought two mugs as gifts for coworkers and they were very pleased. The print was clear and concise. Hopefully they last a long time.
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