Lichtensteiner lollipop

a sexual act in which a load is dumped in a fedora, which is then proceeded to be worn during coitus. During coitus, a midget stands on the shoulders of the man, and a hole must be cut in the fedora so the midget may fit his shaft in the fedora, encasing it in fecal matter. More layers of midgets and fedoras may be added. While this is happening, the male inserts a lollipop into the hole in his dick, stick first, and the female gives him oral. The female may have midgets on her back too. Meanwhile, the female is to give anal to a male platypus. Male platypi are known to have venomous spurs on the inner thigh, and as the platypus is probably scared and confused by the entire event, it will use the spurs to incapacitate the female while she is sucking the lollipop. The platypus may also be wearing a hat. During all this, the female has several gay men giving her manicures and pedicures and perms. The female also lays on an overturned cactus during all of this, and the back and forth motions rip up her internal organs, which are then feasted upon by the gay men, the midgets, and the platypus. The man may not parttake in the feast, or else it wouldn't be a lichtensteiner lolipop. He must instead commit ritual suicide with a toaster in a bathtub, lolipop still inserted.