football supporters mug

If you take a second to think about every football obsessive that you know you'll realise they're pathologically unable to form regular relationships. Most of them, you'll realise, are terminally single, or shackled to women so neurotic/hideous/smelly that even those meths sodden tramps we were laughing at earlier would think twice about touching them. The only reason they got into football in the first place was because it gave them an excuse to get out of the house that didn't involve conversations with other sentient beings beyond racist chants and ridiculous tirades about goal averages and the past form of northern teams no-one really cares about. People who like football are scared of real life. They don't think they're man enough to interact with the world, they don't have the wit or the panache or the intelligence or the finesse that allows a decent human to discuss art or love or the truth of the universe, so they immerse themselves in a meaningless diversion. The point, it seems, is if anyone asks what they fill their days with, they can say "football" rather than "trainspotting" or "stalking" or, worst of the lot, "nothing at all". And the irony of this pubs farrago is that it's finally shown exactly how empty football supporters lives really are. I think all football obsessives are frauds. I don't think they really care about football. They find it as tedious and unbearable as the rest of us. Anyone with a fully functioning frontal lobe can see that football is the most tiresome activity on the planet. But if the football fans admit the truth then they also have to admit the full extent of their loneliness and despair, so they keep on bluffing for all they're worth. Which is why live football has to be watched in a pub with alcohol. Or why supporters get thoroughly rat-arsed before stumbling onto the terraces. Watching football sober is like Chinese water torture. Times ten. It's boredom and pain fused together in one hideously sadistic package. But watching football pissed is great. Because being pissed, full stop, is great, and nothing can ruin that.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

  • Glossy ceramic, 11 oz
  • Vivid artwork fused into the finish, not a vinyl decal
  • Microwave and dishwasher safe
  • Word on front, definition on back
  • Approximately 3.8" tall
  • Every order personally reviewed
  • Returns & defect-free guarantee

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Customer Reviews

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I appreciated the email asking if the content was correct. Excellent quality and attention to detail. Thank you!

James H. Sep 23
✓ Verified Purchase

its an incredible mug! i would recommend purchasing this awesome product!

bill n. Sep 23

Damonism and #Stolen Valor Coffee Mug These coffee mugs are rugged, solid, high quality and keep the liquids hotter, longer. The definitions of both mugs are spot-on! I will definitely by more. Great work Urban Dictionary!

Forced Karma Sauce Sep 23

why is this a real thing? AND YA'LL ACTING LIKE IT'S NORMAL!?

Ako g. Sep 22

I really like the mug, but I thought I had ordered the all pink one. What came was a white with a block of pink with "Fubar" written on it.

Barbara S. Sep 22
✓ Verified Purchase

the only reason why i care about humanity this mug is the reason why i believe humanity deserves a second chance, even after they blaspheme my name. this mug is the greatest thing i've ever seen and i have ordered many of them. this mug replaces the holy grail. the bible should've told about the wonderful deeds of the mug and how it saved humanity from my wrath. alas, whilst the laws keep me from tampering with human minds and altering holy objects like the bible, i can only pass on my message: "spread the news and buy this mug!"

GOD Sep 21

Its.. omg, its............. AMAZING AMAZING OMG ITS SOOO GOOD

desfhueshd e. Sep 21

A mug for your boyfriend Paul????? My boyfriend is not called Paul. I don't even have a boyfriend

Yolanda Linares Sep 19

Great mug... finally got my ""your mom gay lol" mug, I'm so happy

Jackoof Sep 18

ariana grande mug omg this slays mah life

ariana grande is a queen Sep 18

It was easy to correct grammar when necessary, and then to order a great gift for a member of a wedding party. Nice, simple, and sturdy mug.

Etan N. Sep 18
✓ Verified Purchase

with this we regain gods trust This mug changes my views of humanity. I think we may have a chance of not going extinct. Everyone should own this fantastic mug. Oh it's also has a nice handle.

Yeet Skeet Sep 17

Love that I got an Urban Dictionary word definition from someone I know! So much fun and great memory item!! 😊

Jamie W. Sep 15
✓ Verified Purchase

I like it but it took a long time getting here

Bruce M. Sep 15
✓ Verified Purchase

Very basic mug but does the trick!

Daniel B. Sep 14
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The mug is of good quality but advertisement needs to change as the sample photo for ordering gives the customer an illusion that the entire mug is of that color ordered when it is not

Melissa L. Sep 13
✓ Verified Purchase

muffinism mug very bold mug i love it u should buy one

numpty muffin Sep 12

Oof oof this mug gives me life every single day. i have no other reason to wake up in the morning. also this website is the only thing that's ever loved me.

buyin'dumbmugs Sep 10
Review by Jada D.

The fact you guys make custom mugs is the most hilarious yet smartest thing ever, thank you so much I'm definitely gonna collect these and chuckle at the crazy words/terms only I will understand the depth of! 😂

Jada D. Sep 10
✓ Verified Purchase

Nice, but I need the “Reservation Dogs” version of “Aho!”

Richard B. Sep 10
✓ Verified Purchase
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