Aztec Fist Bump custom mug

The Aztec Fist Bump is an ancient technique used by Aztecs to, what they believed that ‘cured’ constipation. It’s a procedure that involves making two incisions in the abdomen, then inserting and pressing your fists against the intestines. Then the one preforming the procedure would squeeze an area of the intestine track together with their fist, collapsing that area and forcing any stool in said area to pass down through the intestine. This graphic procedure obviously came with horrible side effects, and sometimes even resulted in death. But it was believed that doing this would massage and re-shape your intestine walls, so future stools would not get clogged up as they have in the past. Today, it is used as a sexual move, but has been majorly scaled down and de-intensified. Most modern acts include using your fists to rub the pressure points located near the intestine and massaging the area of constipation to help stool pass through the body quicker so that they may take part in sexual acts using said stool. (Note: Please note that NONE of what this says is actually real and I wrote this as a meme. If you want to play someone, remove this note through the source code. >:D )

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Customer Reviews

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Cute, simple, as advertised.

Eli S. Sep 28
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My great great great great great uncle’s dog’s daughter’s owner’s sister loved this mug. Must recomend!!!

Dhar M. Sep 26

Got this for my dog

Kolbie L. Sep 25
Customer photo from Joy B.'s review

As a Jolology major, I love my new mug!

Joy B. Sep 25
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It was for a friends 70th b-day. When we order it, it was going to come 2 day after the party. But we were so excited it came 3 days before his party. It was a big hit. Thank you.

Cindy C. Sep 24
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I gave it as a gift and the recipient loved it. No indication where it was made, so maybe USA? That would be really nice, if so.

William K. Sep 24
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I appreciated the email asking if the content was correct. Excellent quality and attention to detail. Thank you!

James H. Sep 23
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its an incredible mug! i would recommend purchasing this awesome product!

bill n. Sep 23

Damonism and #Stolen Valor Coffee Mug These coffee mugs are rugged, solid, high quality and keep the liquids hotter, longer. The definitions of both mugs are spot-on! I will definitely by more. Great work Urban Dictionary!

Forced Karma Sauce Sep 23

why is this a real thing? AND YA'LL ACTING LIKE IT'S NORMAL!?

Ako g. Sep 22

I really like the mug, but I thought I had ordered the all pink one. What came was a white with a block of pink with "Fubar" written on it.

Barbara S. Sep 22
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the only reason why i care about humanity this mug is the reason why i believe humanity deserves a second chance, even after they blaspheme my name. this mug is the greatest thing i've ever seen and i have ordered many of them. this mug replaces the holy grail. the bible should've told about the wonderful deeds of the mug and how it saved humanity from my wrath. alas, whilst the laws keep me from tampering with human minds and altering holy objects like the bible, i can only pass on my message: "spread the news and buy this mug!"

GOD Sep 21

Its.. omg, its............. AMAZING AMAZING OMG ITS SOOO GOOD

desfhueshd e. Sep 21

A mug for your boyfriend Paul????? My boyfriend is not called Paul. I don't even have a boyfriend

Yolanda Linares Sep 19

Great mug... finally got my ""your mom gay lol" mug, I'm so happy

Jackoof Sep 18

ariana grande mug omg this slays mah life

ariana grande is a queen Sep 18

It was easy to correct grammar when necessary, and then to order a great gift for a member of a wedding party. Nice, simple, and sturdy mug.

Etan N. Sep 18
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with this we regain gods trust This mug changes my views of humanity. I think we may have a chance of not going extinct. Everyone should own this fantastic mug. Oh it's also has a nice handle.

Yeet Skeet Sep 17

Love that I got an Urban Dictionary word definition from someone I know! So much fun and great memory item!! 😊

Jamie W. Sep 15
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I like it but it took a long time getting here

Bruce M. Sep 15
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