What's on your mug?

The primary reason for showering toilet seats and bathroom floors just after waking up from a nightmare about exploding in a sewage treatment plant and never being able to have sex again. Three times in twenty years of marriage wasn't enough.

Marsha; I'm so sick of cleaning the bathroom after you, damn it! John; It's not my fault I keep telling you, it's the morning wood! Marsha; Right, dead eye! I'd give you a mop but you'll probably wipe the den. I wish you morning wouldn't!

By Martha Stewbird

A song by Nth Degree about having morning wood.

M-O-M-O-R-M-O-R-N-I-N-G-W-O-O-D TO THE Nth DEGREE!!! I love Morning wood!

By Co0k1eM0n5tr805

That feeling you get when you wake up and want to mine some trees in minecraft.

Mum, look at the size of the morning wood I have!

By ShampooDrinker

see monopoly and stiffy

i dunno what causes morning wood

By ross

morning wood is often caused by the lack of realese from the male testicales because you cant masturbate in your sleep so you will wake up with a morning wood and stick in dans cats arse hole and plumet it into the propelar of a girafes snake then blast a moon shop while walking to the fish and accidentily stand on the eifil tower wich suddenly rams up your arse hole because it turns out the eiffil tower had morning wood as well so then it spun you around and you fly to tescos and get a meal deal because your very exaughsted from fucking dans cat

i woke up with a fat stiffy and got caught with it half way in dans cat wich fixed my morning wood then it poked back up and i realised i wasnt finished so i stuck it in dans fish for a final time and raped it in to a coma turns out i fucked its gills not its arse now i have meningitase

By runny one