See Also prep, slapper, chav, trendy, fashionista: Mindless losers who are sheep and follow the flock mindlessly just to fit in and be accepted, The Average Townie is easily manipulated by others or Imperialist Media which is robbing people of there individuality and dictating what is cool see mtv, c4 and juice tv
The Average Townie is aged between 11 and 29 but can be much older or more alarmingly much younger. They loiter in groups of no less than 3 and can be found loitering at Te Aro park or Odlin Square drinking cheap cider and RTDs. If the townie is old enough he/she is usually seen in "rough cunt" nightclubs such as The Lab or Rain.
The MALE Townie is obsessed with his car - usually a late model Mazda RX or Subaru -, and often drives it at rediculously high speeds (usually with his mates inside) without any regard for the safety of his passengers, other motorists, or pedestrians. The male townie (see also boyracer when he is not keeping a quiet street awake with his "burnouts", "donuts" and "drags" or potentially killing his passengers, anotehr motorist or an innocent padestrian often Shouts abuse at pedestrians from there windows as they drive by. The Male Townie is distingushable by a Hoodie, Lowrider Jeans, and Beanie and tries very hard to look like a skater when he is just another poser, more recently Male townies have been dressing up in white patterend shirts and Mohawks and passing themselves off as punks when they know they are nothing more than posers. He Generally listens to Rap, Poser Punk and Dance Music
The FEMALE Townie is obsessed with the way she looks - She easily stands out by wearing short (usually denim) skirts, (often with some b/s like "roxy" written on the arse") Knee High Boots, Tube Tops, Tops that are cut off at the shoulder and/or expose much of the back and cleavage in fact anything from supre, glassons or Number One Shoe Warehouse would do her well as she is in these stores more often than her house.In addition to these slutty clothes she also wears a latitude cap thus making her look like a fucking the chav fuck she is. She listens to shit assed radio stns such as the edge and ZM religiously and heavily digs R&b, Rap, Pop, Dance Music, in fact whatevers on the Top 40 at the moment.
Be Warned people - Townies are common bloodstained Criminals, they are the pestilence and like any disease they need to be eradicated.
JERRY: Hamish, Townie Scum down at the Lab, lets go smack em over.
HAMISH: Yeeup, just as soon as weve sorted out the townie scum down at rain, after that smack the ones over at Te Aro Park.
JERRY: DEATH TO TOWNIES!!!
By Brother Number One