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Wal-Mart

The world's largest (and cheapest) retail chain. To keep its costs low, this place has shitloads of security cameras, security alarms, and a "restricted item list" (super glue, razor blades, etc.). Wal-Mart doesn't give a fuck if your car gets damaged by a shopping cart. Also note that this place doesn't sell CDs with "Parental Advisory" stickers on them.

I went to Wal-Mart today and was watched by hundreds of security cameras. I bought a Korn CD (edited version) and replacement heads for my Norelco electric shaver, which showed up as a "restricted item" at the checkout. The alarms beeped as I left the store because the dumb-ass cashier didn't deactivate the security device on my Korn CD. The side mirror of my car fell off because it was hit by a shopping cart. The mother-fucker at the service desk said, "We are not liable for vehicle damage caused by carts."

By Your Grandpa

Wal-mart

1. Place where 90% of my wardrobe comes from. 2. Store where annoying music and LOUD commercials are blared over loudspeakers, in a curteous attempt to drive shoppers from the store in disgust, before they spend too much money. 3.Store that has merchandise of often decent quality at the lowest prices, now- but just until it has driven all competition out of business....then watch the prices rise! 4. Provider of jobs for people who are too stupid and too lazy to be engaged in meaningful employment. (I once encountered a clerk who was unable to deduct ten-percent from a price in her head!) 5. Store where you can buy cooking utensils- then become hungry and walk to McDonalds without going outside, then walk to the pharmacy, for medicine to relieve the diarrhea caused by the McDonalds.

I need to update my wardrobe- to Wal*Mart!

By Malcolm X-crement

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