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A short piece of writing with an average of 5 paragraphs that school children write to improve their experience in writing, grammar and reasoning. They get annoying and laborious once you reach middle school.

The topics that teachers give their students for essays are usually boring and irrelevant topics that are more enjoyable for adults, and sometimes they are actually some of the most impractical subjects to write an essay on.

The most common type is the [argumentative] essay. The total amount of written material from every [argumentative] essay a child has had to write that does nothing to enhance their knowledge or skill would probably rival that of the Marvel Universe, DC Universe, Star Wars Universe and Old and New Testament combined. I honestly think it's why [kids] get so pissed on the internet; because they've been trained to react defiantly to any sort of controversy. I usually title my [argumentative] essays with "Argumentative Essay Number" followed by a massive number like 40 billion or something.

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