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n. an ill-tempered man-beast whose body consists not of meat, bones, and skin, but rather 185 lbs. of well-defined, fully ambulatory fat. Biting sarcasm is his paint, the [keyboard] is his brush, and the seedy [underbelly] of [the Internet] is his canvas. Known to have an unwieldy head of hair, poor eyesight, and hostility toward ampersands.
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