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An overpowering, incredibly painful sensation of your “backdoor” demanding to defecate (aka [drop a deuce], colon cannonballs, butt driblets, digested Crayola box), with the inability to produce any colon candy (aka stool, feces, fecal matter, waste) despite a valiant, laborious effort. Butthole Spasms, [period cramps] in your asshole The anal equivalent of the urgency accompanied by a [urinary tract infection]. Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go right now… but you can’t.
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