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Ewoks are teddy-bear like creatures from Star Wars that live on the planet Endor. But do not be fooled by their cuteness. These badass little [motherfuckers] will [fuck you up]. And just when you think they're done [fucking you] up, they'll fuck you up again. There is a reason why you don't see any other animals on Endor; because the Ewoks fucking killed them all. And the ones that they didn't kill are too scared of getting their fucking skins ripped off to show themselves. Nothing on Endor breathes without the Ewoks' permission. Once, they found a Jedi, and they tried to COOK HIM. Then, they encountered an entire legion of the Empire's best troops, and they kicked their asses using nothing but rocks, logs, and a few catapults. Never mess with an Ewok. They will kill you, and play drums with your FUCKING SKULL. At least, if one of 'em doesn't decide to use it as a HAT.
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