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A simple game invented by [English women] who wanted to kill some time while their husbands cleaned the apartment and cooked dinner. (During WWII, thousands of American GIs stationed in Britain prior to the D-Day invasion were able keep British women occupied which led to a temporary decrease in soccer's popularity) Soccer requires moderate stamina but very little skill or strategy, which is why it is such a popular sport in Bolivia and the UK as well as with special education students in the [U.S]. Studies have shown a direct link between fondness for soccer and frequent [masturbation], which is why Britain excels at wanking. Soccer fans have [inferiority] complexes which explains why they have to grossly exaggerate the "skills" required to play soccer (i.e. kicking a ball around and remembering which goal is yours). Last year, the American WOMEN'S team defeated several European men's teams, which surprised many observers.
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