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Possibly the anus of the Hauraki Plains, this locality is home to a rare species of human known as the Ngatean. The male inhabitants are typically good old [farmer Joe] types who can be found at the pub comparing their latest milk figures over a few pints, and the middle age females dignified and friendly. Young females of the species are renowned for their loud mouths, wide legs and K road-like appearance. Ngatean males tend to avoid them at all costs so they prey on [out of towners] or "new blood" (or "fresh D"). They have no morals, but are generous enough to give out free [fish fingers].
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