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Scientists have researched the case and [discovered] that they had emerged from a pile of horse faeces in the depths of filth in every country. Complete and utter waste matter, bacteria, water, all discharged from the bowel and finally through the anus, the Hipster was born. And through time, the compulsion and poison of pop culture had fed it, and it grew a long, grimy blonde mane with pink or purple tips, revoltingly thin bone limbs, a pea-sized brain and buckets full of money to sustain it with necessities: Vans, studded high-waist shorts, revealing tops, coke cans, $1000 cameras, [Apple products], and many more. These creatures can be found in shopping centres or malls. However, their [natural habitat] exists on [the internet]. It is a forest, filled with vibrant, colourful, and hideous pictures. It truly is a strange place. It's called, "Tumblr". Here, the Hipster is free the roam the mountains of sentimental and what they think to be truly inspiring quotes, more often from novels that they have never cared to read (if they know how to read, that it is). It is also a place where they thrive in giving personal “advice” to helpless 80 year old anonymous’, or they simply send messages to themselves, such as: “Your beautiful babe”. Hipsters are creatures of vanity and conceited values, they tend to fish for [compliments], and if those needs are not met, then they have a tendency to feed themselves that extra boost of arrogance.
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