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1.) The lone reporter in the [ghost town] of a newsroom after the five-day reporters head out to live normal lives. This reporter is [responsible] for anything that happens on [Saturday and Sunday]. Most of the time this means sending the reporter to a stupid event usually involving cute animals and children. This likelihood heightens during the summer months when festivals are rampant. 2.) Someone who has no life and has self image and self esteem problems. Probably has never touched a girl in their entire life. 3.) A sad, sad excuse for a person and a reporter. 4.) Awesome.
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