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[The Only Way Is Essex] (popularly abbreviated to 'TOWIE'): An unbearably awful television programme, comparable to the crusty wank-stains on the knickers of your grandma's urine-soaked, faecal-filled incontinence pants. The show also consists of fake, orange, talentless chav 'actors' who are severely [mentally retarded], and the only kindness humanity can show them is by shooting them [in the head], thus purging the World of their existence. TOWIE.
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