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Mountain Monkey(noun): Lazy, self-entitled, usually uneducated male who resides in the mountains and valleys of the Islamic Republic of Afghanistan. They enjoy wearing man-dresses, subjugating women, physically and verbally abusing the mentally handicapped, [intoxication] through the use of [opium] and opium products(i.e. heroin), and fornicating with farm animals(usually goats and sheep but bovine are certainly not safe either) and small boys. Their preteen wives are usually extremely neglected because all of the mountain monkey's sexual energies are taken out on either his flock of sheep or the behind of another mountain monkey. They have a deeply ingrained belief that Americans(or Westerners in general for that matter) owe them something because unlike them we have, as a culture, managed to progress beyond the 12th century while they remain willfully ignorant and stuck in the cultural, political, [technological] and ideological backwaters. It must also be noted that the mountain monkey has an extreme aversion to all forms of [personal hygiene] as well as public sanitation.

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