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[The company] of The Great Masters of Pubic Science were founded by the two top managers, Freda Mason & Georgia Sofokleous. They're main work is to do anything that has stuff to do with pubescity and ask people about how hairy their "garden" is in their "magic kingdom" and also give awards to guys with the sexiest titties (who is now fired for a very important reason) and girls with the most penis-looking vaginas. Thanks to The Great Masters of Pubic Science, there are now special shampoos and conditioners specially made to [keep] your pubic hair healthy, damage-free and nice smelling, so your partner doesn't complain about your pubic hair smelling like your breath (in other words, like SHIT!). You can find our shampoos and conditioners anywhere in drugstores where they sell cocaine, roofies and [flavored condoms]. We hope you enjoy using our pubic cleaning products. Oh, and if you have the hairiest "garden" or [the biggest] guy nipples contact us. I'm not telling you how, just find a way. : Thank you.

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