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Long Island has no cultural institutions, heritage or history. It does have malls, its own language and lots of statutory rape. This is the land of Joey Battafuccos and Amy Fishers. Most people from outside the Island, think "there must be something wrong with the water on Long Island". This is a common phrase used in NYC, Westchester and Fairfield. Most of the people on LI have never left LI which gives the place a very haunted and inbred feel. Those who are ambitious will go to college instead of working at their uncle's detailing shop but will go to Hofstra or LIU so they don't have to leave. Many LIers hope to one day work at Cablevision (which is run by a junkie who screwed up the NY Knicks and his daddy's company) or the LIRR where it was found that 90% of retiree's were also claiming 100% disability with their pensions. Most girls in LI gain sexual experience early at the hands of adult males, many of them married. This is one of the reasons why LI girls usually look washed out by the time they are 18. Drugs are a contributing factor. Many people believe that if you give a LI girl some cocaine you are guaranteed anal sex. Much of this sex occurs at one of LI's many motels which charge by the hour and are hotbeds of adultery and body lice. Boys on LI look forward to the day when they men and can begin feeding cocaine to LI girls in return for anal sex at motels. Since they have to wait, they will usually spend their teens doing drugs and drinking in parking lots.

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