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Kochaine is a highly addictive substance derived from the rare and toxic Koch parasite, cousin to thefairly common North American Kochroach. Kochaine is harvested from the manure of obscenely wealthy [billionaires]. Kochaine abuse destroys lives and frequent use leads to erratic, zombie-like behavior, turning addicts into "koch-heads". Side effects may include [selective hearing], partial blindness, [delusions of grandeur] and criminal impulses.
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