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A rural village near Canterbury, Kent with its own St Mary's church. It also has a local primary school which is frankly a hovel of learning full [to the brim] with the local scallywag pikes and other chav riff-raff, occasionally gifted youth are sent there and make it to [secondary school] but fewer still carry on to do A-levels or proper [university] degrees, let alone learn to read or spell.
It contains many picturesque houses and cottages by the river Stour which runs directly through the village to power the newspaper factory via a watermill. It is the main manufacturer of the Kent Gazette, a small and thoroughly useless article which only contains information that the geriatric or [otherwise] mentally derranged would care about. Chartham is rather ruined by the area of slums known as "The Hyde", where Chavs and Irish-Tinker-Settlers use their spawn to collect benefits from the government to build their nests. They are an invasive sub-species of human (Homo Homonculus?) and have spread in recent years at an alarming rate. They can give birth to litters of 4 and can raise up to 8 at one time.

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