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A layer of [toilet paper] (usually somewhere between 3 and 8 pieces) laid down on the surface of water within the [toilet bowl] before one has a bowel movement. This layer of toilet paper, or ‘landing pad’, serves a 3-fold purpose: (1) To prevent the dreaded splashback effect caused by the fecal displacement of water; (2) To soften the “KER-PLUNK!” sound that often occurs when feces breaks the surface tension of the water (this is [particularly] effective because the toilet paper disables the properties of water’s surface tension by acting as a semi-permeable membrane, a sort of dampening medium between water and air; further, the speed of the displacement of the water is lessened, which makes for a much softer noise); and (3) To bring about an awareness of the TP supply before use, negating any chance that one might have a bowel movement, only to look over and notice that there is no toilet paper.
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