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A dry and pretentious person, a pretzel is used as a metaphor. This is because pretzel snacks have pretended to be the healthier [alternative] to [potato chips] for years, when in fact, then have more calories per gram. Pretzels are also dry and flavorless; this matches the [description] of a person perfectly. Furthermore, pretzels are usually salted; a salty person is usually unpleasant.
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