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Second most boring state in the nation. Many seek refuge in other states in order to prevent their eventual [transformation] into an Ohioan; a half-dead species which points at deer whenever they see one in a field, is disgusted with all sports teams that are not part of [The Ohio State University], is horribly disgusted with all who do not pronounce the "The" part of aforementioned college with pride, and requires a biweekly trip to Bob Evans in order to prevent starvation. We'd evacuate the entire state if we could, but the only place that would take us would be [West Virginia], and we all know that's the only place worse off than us.
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