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An angst-ridden, unhappy child, anywhere from the age of 13-19, who's only dream that he/she hasn't given up on is to venture to the mall whenever he/she is not in school (and as long as mommy's giving him/her a ride) and [collaborate] with other Mall-Tards like him/herself. 80% of Mall-Tards specifically are overweight, 15 year-old scene girls, who tend to insult any unsuspecting passerby under their breath, without mercy or remorse. Beware the Mall-Tard when in groups. Very much like the nimble wolf, they have power in numbers. Groups of Mall-Tards may even muster up enough backbone to say something unkind to you within the range of decibels that the human ear can pick up! Not unlike the wolf, the Mall-Tard is rarely seen outside of its pack- although they have been known to split from their main company into smaller platoons in [order] to cover more area. This can be useful when said Mall-Tards want to have their presence known in the food court, but can't sacrifice the search for the extra-small [Bullet for My Valentine] shirts in Hot Topic. Mall-Tards have a never-ending hatred for all that walks on two legs- and beyond. Many theorize that this hatred is [manifested] from the smoldering remains of their haunted and traumatic pasts, but many experts [in the field] also argue that they are only pussies and ass-eaters with no knowledge of the world or its people, and have plenty of their parents money to blow.
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