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A term for a mousy-type woman, who might wear [glasses] and have a beak-like nose, and somewhat [pretentious] about films and stage performances, very dorky about such things and all, and has a preference for melted cheese on almost any other type of food other than unmelted cheese.

A cheese-bird may be known to smear brie on [white bread] and consider it a delicacy, or eat wheels of cheddar in just a few days. The cheese-bird strays from cheeses like Morbier, Stilton, and Cambazola. The cheese-bird prefers basic American cheeses such as Colby, Monterey Jack, Mild Cheddar, and even Sharp Cheddar too! And scoffs in [maniacal laughter] at the mention of Velveeta, somewhat [pretentious] in her faux-expertise on the subject of high-class varieties of American-made cheeses. She may consider her knowledge that 'chevre' is the French equivalent of 'goat cheese', and attempt to advise others, who already know as such, of such inanities.

Cheese-birds are known to fly to Wisconsin for winter, and sometimes, their bellies become so filled with cheese in such a cheese-fueled society there, that they can't fly out of the cheese-bird ponds from too much cheese-weight, and their legs then become frozen there in the icy pond, and they die there, lonely corpses, farting out fetid, sulfuric cheese-farts from their rotted and frozen cheese-bird zombie corpses.

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