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The percent chance that an outing will have an insurmountable amount of [douche bags] hanging around and comparing douche beards and faux hawks. Or talking about who could kick whose ass every five minutes. You might know if you have douchability if you can [understand] the native bark of a fellow douche bag. It sounds somewhat like a [mountain lion] raping a bear. They can also be found at clubs dancing in horny trains or fist pumping.
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