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The process of gastral distress from the consumption of stomach altering foods. Categorized by these alert levels Green Alert= Gastral Distress at a minimum. Yellow Alert= Stomach pangs intensify and flatulence occurs Red Alert= sharp pains and if have a sudden laugh you might shit yourself. Brown Alert= shit has ruptured [in your pants] and you need a quick cleanup [because you are] [disturbing] others around you with the smell. Orange Alert= gas has built up and your ass swells along with brown alert.
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