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Canada’s History is a bold and unsurpassed when it comes to upholding dignity and honour. During Canadas infancy the newly joined colonies of the [United States] attempted a takeover of what was then Upper Canada. Canada brought an end to the temper tantrum of its spoiled infantile brother to the south, by lighting a match and setting the American white house ablaze, while stating “Don’t Tread On Me....Bitch!"

Not to be confused with the deviant sexual act “Canada’s History” performed south of the Canadian border, which includes the use of Hockey sticks dipped in Maple syrup, moose antlers and the unwilling participation of an American Bald Eagle. It has been said that this sexual act was made popular by the famous television personality known as [Stephen Colbert]. Pronounced (Coal-Bert) provided you’re not an effeminate male from the Carolinas.

When you look at Canada’s History with the [United States] you can easily understand why participants of this sexual act would [name] the act “Canada’s History” Given the royal ass beating they recieved from Upper Canada.

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