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A Theobald Wolfgang is a person whose personality is tinged with sarcasm, which is used as a self defense mechanism in all situations. He/she will keep Orbit in business during his/her lifetime due to an insatiable chewing gum fetish.

A Theobald Wolfgang will also [generally] be obsessed with the movie 500 Days of Summer and Actimel yogurt drinks. He/she usually has a remarkable ability to quote entire scenes of movies perfectly but will struggle to explain exactly what the movie itself is about.

While he/she dislikes most animals, a Theobald Wolfgang will generally have an odd obsession with cats, often keeping two at a time in his/her company.

A Theobald Wolfgang will also employ a chant known only as 'The Chop' from time-to-time in an ability to highlight how obvious a statement made by his/her companion is. However, this chant is usually met with looks of incredulity from all within ear-shot of the [conversation] for its almost mocking tone and [condescending] manner.

A Theobald Wolfgang enjoys writing and [playing football] in his/her spare time, but will modestly claim to be useless at both despite the many accolades and praises of his/her peers.

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