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1. Horrible, painful metal contraptions that are placed on your teeth by people with no [sense of humor] and a love of seeing kids in pain (called "orthodontists"). 2. A combination of metal wires, brackets and teeny rubber bands that sap you of the ability to talk normally, eat candy, get a date, and wake up without a checker pattern etched into your gums. 3. A device placed on the teeth that leaves you crying every 6 weeks as you leave the [orthodontist] because they say you won't get them off for another few months (yet, you're still "[almost there]!")
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